LoadingReadyWiki - User contributions [en]

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2016-06-02T01:23:11Z

Phailhammer: /* Crossing the Streams */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "ING!ING!ING!ING!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "Camera, please."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

==Exodus from the Earth==
*Woman: "I can just imagine the son of a bitch chasing his monkey."
:Graham: "Is that a euphemism for something?"
::'''''Exodus from the Earth'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

==Mario Party 8==
*Beej: "I'm Beej."
:''*pause; Beej gestures for the others to introduce themselves*''
:Heather: "I'm not Beej."
:Ian: "I am also not Beej."
:Cam: "I am Beej."
::'''''Mario Party 8'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
:Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
:Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Tinker Tailor Solder Fry=
*''*Ian talks about a jacket that still has needles embedded in it*''
:Alex: "Just run it through an MRI."
:Cori: "That's how you break an MRI!"
:Alex: "It's fine."

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2016-05-31T02:16:42Z

Phailhammer: /* Tinker Tailor Solder Fry */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "ING!ING!ING!ING!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "Camera, please."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

==Exodus from the Earth==
*Woman: "I can just imagine the son of a bitch chasing his monkey."
:Graham: "Is that a euphemism for something?"
::'''''Exodus from the Earth'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
:Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
:Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Tinker Tailor Solder Fry=
*''*Ian talks about a jacket that still has needles embedded in it*''
:Alex: "Just run it through an MRI."
:Cori: "That's how you break an MRI!"
:Alex: "It's fine."

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2016-05-31T02:15:17Z

Phailhammer:

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "ING!ING!ING!ING!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "Camera, please."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

==Exodus from the Earth==
*Woman: "I can just imagine the son of a bitch chasing his monkey."
:Graham: "Is that a euphemism for something?"
::'''''Exodus from the Earth'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
:Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
:Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Tinker Tailor Solder Fry=
''*Ian talks about a jacket that still has needles embedded in it*''
:Alex: "Just run it through an MRI."
:Cori: "That's how you break an MRI!"
:Alex: "It's fine."

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2016-03-31T01:58:46Z

Phailhammer: /* Dark Souls */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "ING!ING!ING!ING!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam (repeatedly): "Camera, please."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

==Exodus from the Earth==
*Woman: "I can just imagine the son of a bitch chasing his monkey."
:Graham: "Is that a euphemism for something?"
::'''''Exodus from the Earth'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
:Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
:Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2016-02-13T02:39:15Z

Phailhammer: /* Let's Nope */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

==Exodus from the Earth==
*Woman: "I can just imagine the son of a bitch chasing his monkey."
:Graham: "Is that a euphemism for something?"
::'''''Exodus from the Earth'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
:Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
:Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T05:54:22Z

Phailhammer: /* Meeuuw */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T04:06:39Z

Phailhammer: /* Meeuuw */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham:: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, they would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T04:05:39Z

Phailhammer: /* Meeuuw */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham:: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, the would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T04:04:44Z

Phailhammer: /* Watch + Play */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

==Meeuuw==
*Graham:: I don't know why this game exists.
:Alex: I don't care why this game exists. It's marvellous.
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

*Graham: "If seagulls could breathe fire, thy would be utter bastards."
::'''''Meeuuw'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T03:46:54Z

Phailhammer: /* Watch + Play */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

==Twin Sectors==
*Alex throws burning gas bottle at a door, blowing it open"
:Oscar: "You made a good call on that door, Nine."
:Graham: "No you didn't!"
::'''''Twin Sectors'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-10-17T03:08:41Z

Phailhammer: /* Watch + Play */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

==Executive Towers==
*Alex, commenting on the NPC animations: "I've heard stories about what it's like to be on drain opener, but I've never seen it."
::'''''Executive Towers'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-09-11T03:25:20Z

Phailhammer: /* House of Stark */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

==Gat Out of Hell==
*Graham: "Where did you end up?"
:Sean: "In the lava."
:Graham: "So, what you're saying is, we don't have an armoured car anymore."
::'''''Gat Out of Hell'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-09-03T01:49:59Z

Phailhammer: /* Bloodborne */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* an anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-09-03T01:49:08Z

Phailhammer: /* Bloodborne */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "Hit it in the butt!"
:Cam: "I'm trying, woman!"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Julie: "It has an anus."
:Cam: "It *had* and anus."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''
*Cam (in combat): "I ain't got time for your shit, son."
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-06-19T02:34:52Z

Phailhammer: /* Grand Theft Auto V */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''
*''Nightvalien28 (in chat) jokingly suggests holding R2 during a glitched mission''
:Graham: "Nightvalien, I will put you through a window."
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-05-31T04:50:36Z

Phailhammer: /* Condemned 2 */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:[[Coriander Dickinson|Cori]]: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian (looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-05-02T04:34:52Z

Phailhammer: /* Spooky's House of Jump Scares */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:Cori: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian(looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Graham: "Who put their skull in the shoe cupboard?"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''

LoadingReadyRun Streams Quotes

2015-05-02T02:48:51Z

Phailhammer: /* Let's Nope */

{{Construction}}

=CheckPointPlus=
*Kathleen: "I can't control what comes out of my mouth. There's no brain thing there. The tongue is engaging separately. It's pure reptile instinct."
::'''''CP+ After-Show'''''
*Kathleen: "Come down to GSC Europe map warehouse where GSC stands for Geograpically Somewhat Correct. Our maps are mostly European but have great new countries, like [[Snorsh]]."
::'''''[http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/519899463?t=28m46s CP+ After-Show] subscriber commercial'''''
*Graham: "I haven't even been to Blight Town yet."
:Kathleen: "I don't know what that means."
:Graham: "You'll be able to infer it when I start screaming from the other room."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''
*Graham: ''*after getting the NAACP confused with the AARP*'' "We are from a different country. We don't know your things."
::'''''CheckPointPlus'''''

=Graham & Paul Let's Play=
==Dark==
*[[Graham Stark|Graham]]: "I can tell you about Sanctuary. Dude, they have twins, *twins*, working there, though the DJ doesn't know what she's doing. She's a real bitch."
::'''''Dark'''''
*''Graham begins level in a dead-end alley, facing out''
:Graham: "Where did I come in from?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*[[Paul Saunders|Paul]]: ''*making fun of the take-down animation*'' "By the rules of this game I'm playing, I have to die now."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Okay men, we're going up against dangerous vampires that have killed dozens of people, but the budget's a bit tight, so only half of you get armour."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "I don't see how that's a special power. It's just teleporting and punching a guy."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "These guys need a radio. Seriously. This is not the sort of information you should be sending over email."
:Paul: ''*imitating soldier*'' "Hey, did you get that message about me advancing? GMail's been acting weird lately."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: "What was your plan?"
:Graham: "I was going to punch him, but he wasn't close enough."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: "Oh, food! No, wait, he's got armor."
::'''''Dark'''''
*Graham: ''*after finishing 'Dark'*'' "You know what we could do for the next hour?"
:Paul: "Cry bitterly?"
::'''''Dark'''''
*Paul: ''*after finishing Dark*'' "We are no longer playing Dark." [pause] "Dark can Get. Fucked."
::'''''Dark''''' -- [http://youtu.be/Yo5UXCJxRyQ?t=8m25s YouTube (8:25)]

==Beyond: Two Souls==
*Paul: ''*looking at a cake, playing as Aiden*'' "I threw it on the ground!" ''*cake explodes*''
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "No burning?"
:Graham: "Eh, I don't think we have to kill them all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "So, you wanna sleep with the guy later?"
:Graham: "Yeah, sure."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "My apologies to the people upset that we missed a thing, but I really don't care."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie is expected to deliver a baby*''
:Graham: I don't... I... Key..."
:Paul: "The CIA did '''not''' train me for this."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Graham: "X to comfort!"
:Paul: "You have failed the comforting mini-game. She is not comforted at all."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A QTE appears for Jodie to cut the umbilical cord*''
:Graham: "Oh God, don't fuck this up."
:Paul: "Why is cutting the cord like a God of War sequence?"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*Paul: "It's like 'Think, Jodie, think... I know, the ghost thing that's the point of this game! I'll use that!'"
:Graham: "'I'm a genius!'"
:Paul: "'...The thing that I use to solve every single problem!'"
:Graham: "'It's brilliant!'"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Jodie knocks on the door and a very handsome Native American answers it*''
:Jodie: "I'm so sorry to disturb you"
:Graham: "...you massive hunk of man."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*A guard turns Jodie away from the Supermarket*''
:Graham: "What, you just ''know'' she's homeless, and you're all like: 'Ah-ah-ah!'"
:Paul: "Well she ''is'' all roughed up..."
:Graham: "It could be Exam Period!"
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''
*''*Paul notices that Aiden is no longer tied to Jodie*''
:Paul: "I'm freeeeeee!"
:''*gets blocked by wall*''
:Paul: "Aww."
::'''''Beyond: Two Souls'''''

==Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance==
*Paul: "You have lost your RPG privileges young man."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: ''*reading chat*'' "'Did you just fight a helicopter with a sword?' Yes. If you have a problem with this, get out."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I ''may'' have accidentally destroyed that train car."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "This bad guy comes pre-sliced."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "I forgot I had the thing made of arms."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: ''*after having a game mechanic explained in a near-end final boss fight*'' "'''OH!''' That explains '''EVERY QUESTION I HAD WITH THIS COMBAT SYSTEM'''."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Graham: "His sword legitimately has Twitter."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''
*Paul: "My platform: Enormous spider robots for everyone! A spider robot in every garage! Also, larger garages."
::'''''Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance'''''

==The Witcher 2==
*Graham: "Racial Profiling: It's not ''always'' wrong!"
::'''''The Witcher 2'''''

==Ryse: Son of Rome==
*Graham: "Search the swamp for enemies and/or Yoda!"
::'''''Ryse: Son of Rome'''''

==Killzone: Shadowfall==
*In-game voice: ''"You've lost sight of what matters!"''
:Paul: "Hey, I am all about what matters! Poontang."
::'''''Killzone: Shadowfall'''''

==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "I lit myself on fire, but on the plus side, I lit the rest of them on fire."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''

=Things on My Stream=
==Oni==
*Paul: "The problem is '''real''' buildings are boring."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Don't make me put my face in front of your fists. Because I wouldn't like to do that."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "How do you like them apples? I bet you don't like them at all. I bet you don't like apples in that way."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Enemy: "You're weak!"
:Paul: "Well, you're flipped, so what are you gonna do about it?"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "Oh no! He got palette-swapped! The worst!"
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "''*excitedly*'' This actually brings us to '''another'''... ''*goes disappointed*'' flaw with this game."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "I got hit by all of the missiles. Look at the difference in my life."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "It's in good hands, but I don't know whose hands those are."
::'''''Oni'''''
*Paul: "This is the Saga of Baggage Handler Man!"
::'''''Oni'''''
==Out of This World==
*Paul: ''*desk explodes*'' "That was a large part of my desk that I needed. Also, me."
::'''''Out of This World'''''
*Paul: ''*after about 30-odd deaths on one part*'' "What the hell?! I did all that and it's a '''dead end'''?"
::'''''Out of This World'''''
==Psychonauts==
*Paul: "You are right. The reason Graham isn't here, is that he hates you."
::'''''Psychonauts'''''
==Loom==
*Voiceover: "Please select your skill level."
:Paul: *selects expert* "We're not scrubs here."
::'''''Loom'''''

=Beej's Backlog=
''Main Article: [[Beej's Backlog]]''
==Endless Ocean==
==Prince of Persia: Warrior Within==
*[[Brendan Dery|Beej]]: "Oh god, it begins."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Oh, right. The nineties."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*''Opening cut-scene shows pirate ships''
:Beej: "So for those of you tuning in, we are playing ''Assassin's Creed: Black Flag''. The reason it looks like garbage is because I'm playing it on your least favorite video game system - you can fill in THAT blank however you like."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I'm totally getting this game-'''OH, JESUS!'''"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "Do I slide to the bottom, or do I just keep humping poles?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "I stabbed between her legs, didn't I?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (after the camera clips through an enemy): "Hey, did you guys ever want to see the ass-end of an exploding dog?"
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "You take forever to get up you dumb dick."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej: "She's naked. She's not invincible."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
*Beej (on failing to be able to complete the game due to a game-breaking portal glitch right before the last boss battle) : "Get bent, Ubisoft."
::'''''Prince of Persia: Warrior Within'''''
==Odama==
*Just about everyone at some point: "Thanks, Odama!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "How do I launch rice balls?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Does he have giant hands? Why is there...? What the hell is that thing?"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Nooo! Give me my Odama back!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Stop fucking talking so I can see the ball!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Shitty McFucks! My guys can't do dick all!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Don't press the X button while you're having a rant, because these guys don't understand English!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: "Here! Have a morale bong!"
::'''''Odama'''''
*Beej: ''*in happy voice*'' "Oh really?! Oh wow! That sucks! FUCK YOU!"
::'''''Odama'''''
==Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life==
*Beej: "I bet ya I need more of that weed."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought this would be actual food."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "We're going to play until I can grow something successful, get another animal, and either make friends with the old lady, or marry a cat."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*regarding sketchy guy*'' "OK, just walk around my farm. I don't mind. Please don't murder me."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's sunset and I'm missing it because I'm ''watering my '''fucking''' plants''."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "It's 3 AM. What the '''fuck''' am I doing up?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Look! A tomato I grew! Wanna get married?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I thought you were a girl, too. Are you picking me up? I've got some news for ya, kid."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "Did I milk the wrong half of the cow?"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I'm probably going to drink one of the milks, and then probably the second one."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "You're just ''slamming unpasteurized milk''? That's H-core!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "That's the thing about Dixbutt. If Dixbutt is happy, you get better cows."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*picks up unknown object off the ground and eats it*'' "Mmmm... Fresh... thing..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "Twitter and Tumblr are really a getting senpai to notice you simulator."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: ''*to Nami, who won't take the milk he's offering her*'' "You drink my fucking milk!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I wouldn't put a human body in the compost heap. That'd be '''terrible''' for the compost."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I have a dog and I don't know..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "OK, I walk into her butt..."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "He has been underground so long, he has phosphorescent urine."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Alex: "I can't normal people."
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life'''''
*Beej: "I got all dressed up for nothing!"
::'''''Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life''''', when the wedding was basically just a cut to black.
[[Image:beejalex_wed.png]]
==Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike==
*''*getting handle on controls in a speeder, bumping into everything'*''
:Beej: "Oh man, you ''cannot'' destroy this thing."
:''*vehicle crashes into a wall and explodes*''
:Beej: "You '''can''' destroy this thing!"
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "Something big and purple shows up on my screen and I just want to shoot lasers into it."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I can't pick up their weapons. I guess they're part of their hands."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "This is not run-and-gun so much as it is herp-and-derp."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*Beej: "I'm in some kind of... shiny gold Hell..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
*''*boosts straight into the shield gate*''
:Beej: "I hit the wrong button..."
::'''''Star Wars Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike'''''
==Yoot Tower==
*Graham: "How high can you build this thing? '''Have you touched the face of God?'''"
:Heather: "We saw Santa!"
:Graham: "That's almost the same thing."
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
*Beej: "You have an entire floor for peeing!"
::'''''Yoot Tower'''''
==Super Princess Peach==
*Beej: "If you come to LRRCon and I find out you've been calling me a scrub, I'm gonna punch you in the face. I guess my wife will be first when I get home."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "They're my subjects, I can do what I will with them."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "OH YEAH! Fecal transplants are AWESOME!"
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "There's, like, a pound of dicks I need you to eat."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I was a pretty big deal in the Sailor Moon community."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "I've had a buttload of sex."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Beej: "Don't make 'straight penised' a thing."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
*Alex: "Next time you're in Seattle we're going to have to fill you with Dick's."
::'''''Super Princess Peach'''''
==Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door==
*Beej (after dying in Bowser's platforming section): "He has shit physics!"
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Heather: *notices scrub counter in chat* The scrub count is much higher than that."
:Beej: "I think it's per stream."
:Heather: "No, even for this stream it's higher than that."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: *attempting to fly from platform to platform*
:Heather: "You'll get there. I believe in you"
:Beej: "Thank you."
:Beej: *dives off the platform again*
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''
*Beej: "You're not buffering, you're just watching the same thing over and over again."
::'''''Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door'''''

=IDDQDerp=
''Main Article: [[IDDQDerp]]''
==Metro: Last Light==
*''[[Alex Steacy|Alex]] aiming a sniper rifle at a bad guy's head''
:Alex: "What do you think his hopes and dreams look like?"
:[[Cameron Lauder|Cam]]: "Let's look."
:''Boom, headshot.''[http://youtu.be/DoyMJtjPNpo?t=50m7s]
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''
*''Cam sounding out a sign written in Russian''
:Alex: "Wait, you can read that!?"
:Cam: "Well, Cyrillic is heavily based in Greek, right?"
:Alex: "...You can read Greek?"
::'''''Metro: Last Light'''''

==Prayer Warriors: All Out for God==
*Graham: "You got the Belt of Truth!"
:Cam: "What about the socks of righteousness?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "So this really looks like Quake, right? But like BAD Quake?"
:Alex: "This...this looks like Quake by way of Doom or Wolfenstein."
:Cam: "Yeah, this looks like not Quake; like...Heretic?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Are those blood drops on his pool cue!?"
:''Graham cracks up''
:Alex: "What are we even looking at?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "It's just as good as any game a heathen would play."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "This is like "The Room" of video games."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Pick up the scroll; it'll explain everything."
:Alex: "Will it? I suspect it will explain nothing."
:''Alex picks up the scroll and reads it''
:Alex ''*laughing*'': "Who takes drugs out of a test tube?"
:Cam: "Especially if they're carrying a MAC10?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "This is like the game Insane Clown Posse would make."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''Alex repeats the start of the game for the third time''
:Alex: "I am OFFENDED that I'm getting ''better'' at this game."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Wh... Why is there a sub-ocean?!"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "I just do not know whether to shit or go blind."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: ''*picks up scripture*'' "Neat. I've got Corinthians apparently. Is Corinthians good?"
:Graham: "I think you should look at getting them removed. I think Maya had Corinthians once."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Graham: "Can you get the door?"
:Alex: "Is that a door? ''Is anything real?'' Am I real?"
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "OK, let's try and break the brown cube that materialized over the lava gate."
:Graham: "You say that like it's going to be so hard."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*''"STAND AGAINST THE DEVIL!"'' (stage music)
:Alex: '''WE TRIED STANDING AGAINST THE DEVIL, IT DIDN'T WORK!'''
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Cam: "The only thing I can take away from this game is that there is no God."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''
*Alex: "Hey! We've got a '''compass'''!"
:Cam: "That goes from zero to North..."
::'''''Inflict a Game on Alex - Prayer Warriors: All Out for God'''''

==Killing Floor==
*Alex: "You can't just scream like that for no reason!"
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
*Alex: "Really? KFC chips are salty? In other news, the sky is blue."
::'''''Killing Floor'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl==
*Alex: "♫Ride into the YOLO Zone.♫" ''(to the tune of "Danger Zone")''
:Cam: "I hate you so much."
:Alex: "I'm sorry."
:Cam: "I don't think that's true."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Cam: "What was on the other side of that door?"
:Alex: "What do you mean 'was'?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex looting a bad guy after taking him down with a lot of ammo used''
:Alex: "This guy does not have the bullets I need."
:Cam: "Well, he has one of them, at least."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex finishes clearing out a bandit encampment''
:Cam: "How many Russians have you murdered today?"
:Alex: "None! They're all Ukrainian."
:Cam: Oh. Well, that's all right then."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Graham (off-camera): "Can you be straight murdered a little more quietly?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex just straight up drinks two CASES of vodka. POV goes full QWOP''
:Alex: "Boy, are we ever drunk."
:Cam: "It's like I'm at PAX again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex respawns for around the fifth time in the same section''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
:''Alex tosses a grenade into the next room''
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*deadpan*'' "Screw you, rebar."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Sidorovich (NPC): "You got the loot?"
:Alex: "Is.. is.. is that a... that a sex thing?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "HO! They are really rushin'. Rush'''ING'''. They're not Rus... Well, they probably actually are Russian."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Speaker: ''shouting an automated message in Russian''
:Alex: "Did he say he wanted a pizza?"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: "He ''does'' want a pizza!"
:Speaker: (later) ''shouting same message''
:Alex: ''*annoyed*'' "You ''can't have'' a pizza."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*''Alex dies for around the sixth time in the same section''
:Alex: "That was the game's way of punishing us for abandoning 'stoppin' powah'"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "Chat's giving you shit for passing the P90."
:Alex: "Shut up. You're not better than me."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Was that a ''Beyond Thunderdome'' reference?!"
:Beej: "Yep."
:Alex: "I don't know if I'm more offended that you made that reference or that I got it."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You know what a catheter is?"
:Alex: "Beej, this is my stream. I don't want to hear about your stream."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Beej: "You have no idea how happy you can be to be able to pee again."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Why is there just a pelvis? ... Like, did that guy just poop his pelvis out? That's pretty upsetting."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "That uh, for those of you who've never seen one before, is a *zombie appears* nneeenurk burnurfnurgle"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Serge, your plan isn't working. Serge! Your plan is completely murdering me!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "What? You're covered in cat too? What is wrong with you people?"
:Graham (off-camera): "Have you '''seen''' my cat? That's why I'm covered in fur."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Why are there tentacles in our chest?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Apparently, our blind spot is directly in front of us. That's not good."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Serge: "Grenades solve everything."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "Welcome to S.T.A.L.K.E.R.! Is that a rock?!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: "It's some sort of weird mystery gun."
:Serge: "Does it take bullets?"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
*Alex: ''*scared by monster*'' "Hold me, Serge."
:Serge: "You're covered in cat, or else I would."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Shadow of Chernobyl'''''
==Payday 2: The Heist==
*Alex: "Apparently, I loaded my gun with chewing gum this morning."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*AeroCmdr: "I'm throwing a grenade."
:Alex: "Where, '''where''' are you throwing a grenade? That's relevant information."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*''Shielded police appears from around the corner''
:Alex: "'''Oh no!''' What a bad time to have a" ''*gets shot down*'' "erburgermorglefurdle..."
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
*Alex: "Oh, shit a dick nose!"
:AeroCmdr: "Shit a dick nose?"
:Alex: "Yes. Did I stutter or something?"
::'''''Payday 2: The Heist'''''
==Half Life 2: SMOD==
*Alex: "You can't eat pelvises in this mod? Immersion ruined!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "Did that helicopter just throw bones at us?"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "At the risk of crashing the game..."
:''Activates bullet time''
:''Game crashes''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I think there's another sniper...♫"
:''Dies''
:Alex: ಠ_ಠ
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Tosses Antlion Guard up on to platform, where it mauls a Combine soldier''
:Alex: DEAL WITH IT!
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Charges weapon''
:Alex: "KA-ME-HA-MEopps"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "I'll eat your invisible meat!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Shoots a chair at an enemy''
:Alex: "We've decided to appoint you the chair."/"Have a seat."
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Alex: "No, no, we'll do this properly."
:''Pulls out shovel and destroys everything in sight''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Alex turns a corner and a fast zombie charges at him''
:Alex: "Fuck yo' couch!"
:''Launches couch at zombie''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*Rebel: "We're looking to join you Dr. Freeman."
:Alex: ''throws exploding banana at her''
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
*''Destroys wardrobe with shovel''
:Alex: "Take this, Aslan!"
::'''''Half Life 2: SMOD'''''
==Dishonored==
*''Emily goes to play Hide and Seek''
:''Alex jumps off the bridge''
:Alex: "Haha! Broke my legs! I'm good at this game."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: ''*after singing a silly song and not coming up with lyrics to end it*'' "I don't really have an exit strategy for this song."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*after twice shooting a guard with a tranquilizer dart only to find him in a pool of blood*''
:Alex: "Did he fall on his sword? Or is this guy just a hemophiliac?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "If Deadpool was committed to not killing people, that's Good Guy Corvo."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Piero: "Can I be of service to you?"
:Alex: "Yes. You could be less creepy."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*''*finds grapes in sewer water*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Free grapes!"
:''*gags as he eats them*''
:Alex: "Oh those taste ''real good.''"
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "Good Guy Corvo apologizes."
::'''''Dishonored'''''
*Alex: "What the shit?! Why did he explode?!"
::'''''Dishonored'''''

==Dementium 2: HD==
*''*after failing to get the controls in the game to work, Alex can't get the game to quit either*''
:Alex: "Today on IDDQDerp: Alex doesn't play a game."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "I'm being attacked by the cover of a metal album!"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after not knowing what he was doing, the boss monster died*''
:Alex: "I won... apparently..."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "How am I supposed to attack a cloud of flies ''with a sledgehammer''?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: ''*referring to bad ghosts*'' "You guys are putting me to sleep! I find scarier things in the toilet in the morning."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: "The chairs have clipping. The tables do not."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after entering a cave that has buildings in it*''
:Alex: "Where the shit are we now? Are we in crap-tier NORAD?"
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*''*after yet another Chestmaw rises out of floor to try and bar his progress, Alex raises a sledgehammer*''
:Alex: "Whatever, I'm gonna smash your no-shadow-casting ass."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Alex: "Are you kidding me? I lost my super-weapon because I threw it through a door."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''
*Graham: ''*describing an enemy's sound*'' "It sounds like someone's gargling, then getting hit in the balls."
::'''''Dementium 2: HD'''''

==Thief (2014)==
*Alex: "What the fuck is a gabble-wing?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Right. Now where was I, before I was so ''rudely'' interrupted by people doing their fucking job?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is that a jar of raven?"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*Alex: "Is this seriously a brothel? It's got a bat dispenser."
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''
*''*NPCs arguing with each other while the rug is burning*''
:Alex: "Shit's on fire, yo!"
::'''''Thief (2014)'''''

==Teslagrad==
:Alex: "♫ Just gonna fist all of the pillbugs. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''
:Alex: "♫ Don't take that out of context. ♫"
::'''''Teslagrad'''''

==Bulletstorm==
*Alex: "I don't know what this is, but I'm going to blow it up! It looks important!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Try my bullet sauce!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I think I got killed by a punk band."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*enemy explodes a guy using a laser whip*'' "Cool! I want it!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*zaps dying teammate with laser whip*'' "'''LIVE!'''"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Come here! I want to tell you story about bullet! Here is sequel! It's about more bullet! Did you like it?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: ''*sliding down a water-slide*'' "We're having a good time! No, we're drowning..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Gonna shoot you in the dick! That was not your dick; it was your thigh. That was your leg."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Just stop having momentum..."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Why are you made out of Cheetos?"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I am Morgan Freeman and I am going up your ass."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "Elysium? Where's Matt Damon? I want him to explain this shit."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "I look at this game and think SMOD and Quake had a love child, and then it had an abusive foster parent."
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
*Alex: "They were robots! I saw them! They were full of mayonnaise!"
::'''''Bulletstorm'''''
==Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken==
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "I'm so sorry!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*unloading an entire clip into an enemy*'' "Sorry! You looked like a Nazi!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*enters new airship*'' "This one's full of nuclear-tomics."
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: ''*mind-controls the Nazi-esque penguin*'' "Guten Tag!" ''*shoots the other enemies*''
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
*Alex: "Try my air juggle!"
::'''''Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken'''''
==Remember Me==
*Alex: "I am just a photon torpedo."
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "♫ I'm gonna take... a thousand years... to walk down this hallway... to piss you all off! ♫"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "Whoa! There's another cyber-groin-lady-ninja!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "I can't hear you over this John Williams!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*reading graffiti*'' "'You are what you remember.' Then I'm fucked!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*memory overloading enemy*'' "Hope you like infomercials... Here's '''ALL OF THEM!'''"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: "We have to climb Notre Dame Cathedral? Sick!"
::'''''Remember Me'''''
*Alex: ''*gets many Biohazard warnings*'' "Danger: Everything"
::'''''Remember Me'''''

==Silent Hill: Downpour==
*Alex: "Is this a thing? Can I thing this?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Adobe After-Effects is after us again! Shit!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "I am Rag-Bra, the Barbarian!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex (in chat, while the stream was down):
::"well in the mean time we bring you silent hill text version"
::"James Sunderland was really sad in the house"
::"He got his pipe and fought a monster"
::"bad end"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''
*Alex: ''*running away from witch*'' "'''DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK! DOOR STUCK!'''"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "It's a dead black Klansman..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "But I don't '''want''' Jello children!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "You are ''entirely'' too moist..."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*Murphy makes the weakest jump imaginable*'' "How fucking white is this guy?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Susie: "He's a puppy! A large, gangly, eat-your-face puppy!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: "Why is there an ''office'' '''in the safe'''?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*after nailing Jesus to a crucifix*'' "I had a nail gun and He was there! What was I supposed to do?"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Charlotte: "That dude's got a knife."
:''*enemy gets crushed by a door*''
:Susie: "Now he's got a dead."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*fighting the last boss*'' "We're gonna pull the plug, Grandpa! We need that inheritance to get the fuck outta Silent Hill!"
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''
*Alex: ''*quoting the music lyrics*'' "'Consume the darkness in my mind'?"
:Susie: "You don't want to do that. You could get kuru."
::'''''Silent Hill: Downpour'''''

==Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon==
*Alex: "I can just flip people off '''whenever I want'''?"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*after getting his current car shot up, on fire, and rolling it over several times, he finds a new car*''"Is this a better car? Oh, this one isn't busted!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "'Secure area of hostiles'? That's like the ''whole island''!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: ''*laughing*'' "I need to punch the nuclear reactor!"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "♫ Slowest elevator in the universe! ♫"
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
*Alex: "Hang glider? I thought I was going home! How foolish of me."
::'''''Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon'''''
==Lifeless Planet==
*''Alex walks under some barbed wire''
:Alex: "Your security features are" ''*deadly plant appears*'' "wargarble!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
*Alex: ''*misses a jump and falls to death*'' "YOLOFUCKSHITASS!"
::'''''Lifeless Planet'''''
==Alice: Madness Returns==
*Alex: "Be cool-- BE COOL! All of this would have been avoided if you'd just been cool!"
::'''''Alice: Madness Returns'''''
==S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat==
*Alex: "Oh my god! The energy drink is called CRUNK!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex (reloading while being shot at): "Get into the gun, bullets!"
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Now, where are we being shot from?"
:Graham (whispers): "Everywhere..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''
*Alex: "Senpai, I'm so full of bullets now."
:Graham: "..."
::'''''S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Kerbal Space Program==
*Graham: Hey Ray, look at this rocket we're building.
:''*pause*''
:Ray (off-camera): Oh my god.
::'''''Kerbal Space Program'''''

==Besiege==
*Alex: "We're abusing it pretty relentlessly."
:Cam: "Isn't that what it's for?"
::'''''Besiege'''''
*Graham (upon seeing the final version of "Even Worse Ideas"): "Oh my god. You listened to James, you monster."
::'''''Besiege'''''

=The Book of Passwords=
==Metal Gear 2==
*Graham: "Capture card? Capture card!"
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*[[Jer]]: "The cheetah has lost to a snake?"
:Graham: "Well, if the cheetah runs into a mine..."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
*Graham: "When you get to Big Boss, can you ask him why he has random children just littering his facility?"
:Jer: "There was talk of war orphans at some point..."
:Graham: "It's pronounced 'Warphans'."
::'''''Metal Gear 2'''''
==Marathon==
*[[Ian Horner|Ian]] to Jer: "I am very sorry for fisting you as hard as I can."
::'''''Marathon'''''
*Jer: "I want to find out what this is." ''*turns corner*'' "It's a barrel."
::'''''Marathon'''''
==Castlevania: Rondo of Blood==
*Graham: "That bat has a '''sword'''. ''Why'' is that bat carrying a '''''sword'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "You can ''Moonwalk''? You... can... '''''Moonwalk'''''?"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Dracula's got harpies in his clock tower for like his whole friggin' whole life. 'I'm sorry, buddy. You've got harpies. Real bad case up in your clock tower.'"
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Graham: "Jer, I will tell you when you have big balls."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''
*Jer: "I'm sorry. I cannot talk and speak at the same time."
::'''''Castlevania: Rondo of Blood'''''

==Strider==
*Alex: "Why do you collect ''a guy''?"
::'''''Strider'''''
*Jer: "Why are they carrying a bus?"
::'''''Strider'''''
==Diablo==
*Paul: "A sign. You want me to fight deamons for A sign."
:''Slightly later:''
:Paul: "It's a sign! Make a new one!"
::'''''Diablo'''''
==Jet Grind Radio==
*Jer: "Don't take that police officer to the bathroom, [[Ash Vickers|Ash]]. That's really creepy."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Jer: "A train is going through you, at this second."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
*Ash: "Getting hit by buses: super-bad for your health."
::'''''Jet Grind Radio'''''
==Kirby's Dreamland==
*[[Tally Heilke|Tally]]: "We're ''underground!'' '''How are there coconuts?!'''"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "You can't kill those guys... because lame."
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
*Tally: "Kitty-faced bastard!"
::'''''Kirby's Dreamland'''''
==Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara==
*Tally: "We killed a dragon. This is such a wonderful bonding moment. Every marriage should have more dragon slaying in it."
::'''''Dungeons & Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara'''''
=I, Horner=
==Shenmue==
*''*Ian fighting sailors*''
:Ian: "Nope, wrong button."
:''*crashes into the bar*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ryo (in game): "He used a style I've never seen."
:Cori: "He just kept punching me over and over."
:Ian: "The ancient art of 'stop hitting yourself'."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Ian comes across a scroll titled 'Mud Spider'*''
:Ian: "I'm pretty sure that's racist."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*While trying to dial a phone number*''
:Ian: "Whoever is yelling out numbers in the main room, please stop."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*''*Upon discovering the shrine cat is missing*''
:Alex: "I swear to God, if this cat doesn't come back I am burning this office to the ground"
:Ian: "Cori, get on FAQ duty; we need to find out where this cat is."
::'''''Shenmue'''''
*Ian(looking for a travel agency): "This seems like the place."
:''*stops in front of boarded-up shop*''
::'''''Shenmue'''''

=Kathleen Saves the World=
==Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne==
*Alex: Hey, I heard you were playing Atlus games, so I brought some neckbeard.
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*[[Kathleen De Vere|Kathleen]]: "EFF! EFF! EFF!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Get fucked Dante! [...] What a shitbag."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "Thanks for destroying the world, ass-hat!"
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: ''*sweetly*'' "Awwww... Thank you... Go fuck yourself."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''
*Kathleen: "I'm so mad. My face hurts from snarling."
::'''''Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne'''''

==South Park: The Stick of Truth==
*Graham: "Oh hey, you're friends with Jesus."
:Kathleen: "Turns out Jesus is really easy to be friends with."
:Graham: "I should hope so."
::'''''South Park: The Stick of Truth'''''

==Final Fantasy X HD==
*Kathleen: "Alright, time for feels. Then it's time for Yuna to smash this guy's dick in."
::'''''Final Fantasy X HD'''''

==Final Fantasy X 2 HD==
*Kathleen: "Fuck your onions."
::'''''Final Fantasy X 2 HD'''''

=A Swiftly Tilting Cameron=
''Main Article: [[A Swiftly Tilting Cameron]]''
==XCOM: Enemy Within==
*Cam: "Would you look at that mustache? That must be the most handsome man in XCOM."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "$1? Come on! Who wants to buy a bullet-ridden corpse? We took out the important bits and replaced them with holes!" [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h23m34s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Pardonfuck?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Here, I've got something I need you to hold; it's called 'lots of bullets'." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m01s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫Napalm sticks to little children; all the children of the world♫"
:''(to the tune of "Jesus Loves the Little Children")'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h03m50s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm sure the inquiry will say he was killed by Martians."
:''After accidentally killing a civilian'' [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h32m47s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That was a reasonably good turn." ''*takes a drink of his beverage*''
:''As he's saying this, a Chrysalid he thought was dead bursts through the door''
:Cam: ''*nearly chokes on drink*'' "Hi!"
:''Chrysalid chows down on Bill DaCat''
:Cam: "Awww... You were important." [http://www.twitch.tv/loadingreadyrun/b/495567848?t=2h34m46s Video]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We died as we lived; making the wrong choice."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Put on your damn helmet, rookie!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within''''' (repeatedly)
*Cam: "Even though it's in Edmonton"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "♫I don't want to set your van on fire... I just want start a flame in your *PSHEW!*♫"
:''(to the tune of "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire")''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You: Please replace that man's internal organs with holes." ''*fires*'' "Thank you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "The Moonbase is mine now."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I hate you all and wish you were dead. Luckily, I'll get my wish."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I found a pie in the fridge, and I'm gonna eat it, and deal with the consequences. But, I need pie right now."
::After stealing pie from the Moonbase fridge during a particularly bad stream of '''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I have seriously chewed through every woman who watches this show."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Doctor Vahlen to have your legs amputated."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that green thing? Is that a man?"
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "''Was'' it a man?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We're almost definitely going to be tripping a group up here soon."
:Alex: "Wait? The pigeons?"
:Cam: "No, the pigeons are just hanging out."
:Alex: "I bet they're aliens."
:Cam: "Don't you hate on pigeons! You son of a bitch!"
:Alex: "I hate on ''alien'' pigeons."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Squaddie Devin Kerr: "Enemy spotted!"
:Alex and Cam: "D'oh!"
:Alex: "That's a lot of... man-zorrs..."
:Cam: "Eh... They'll be fine."
:Alex: "... running like purple monkeys inside."
:Cam: "..." ''*smiles*'' "Odd... OK..."
:Alex: "Well..."
:Cam: "Um..."
:Alex: "They look like purple monkeys."
:Cam: ''*mock offended*'' "'''Racist!'''"
:Alex: "That's...!" ''*throws hands in air*'' "Sure!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "I assume you only have one rocket per round. Right?"
:Cam: "Yeah."
:Alex: "That sucks, but it's reasonable, 'cause rockets don't grow on trees."
:Cam: "They definitely do not."
:Alex: "I don't think I wanna visit that tree, if there was..."
:Cam: "Yeah, no. The Rocket Tree?"
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree is..."
:Alex: "Rocketry. Amateur Rocketry. It's like, we're going to pick some today, and you're going to be '''''REEEEEEALLY''''' careful."
:Cam: "Agreed."
:Alex: "Turns out turn-over in this job is very high... Just like the bloody chunks."
:Cam: "Welcome to the Rocketry Orchard!"
:''(...)''
:Cam: "The Rocket Tree, with the Farmer Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*laughs*''
:Cam: "Watch out for Old Man Von Braun."
:Alex: ''*bad German accent*'' "'[http://youtu.be/TjDEsGZLbio?t=1m15s Vonce the rockets are up, who cares vhere they come down? That's not my department,' says Wernher Von Braun]."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Aww, Dr. Vahlen, did someone take away one of your toys? File a complaint with HR."
:''After destroying a Meld canister''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Alex: "What's that vortex?"
:Cam: "That's where Mexico used to be."
:Alex: "'''Used''' to be?"
:Cam: "Don't worry about it."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'm glad this version of the Earth is doomed."
:Alex: "This doomed world-line."
:Cam "Yep. Every saved game that we pave results in the extinction of humans on that world, and by that point, I'm pretty happy. I could just sit here all night paving saved games and thinking: Seven billion, fourteen billion, twenty-one billion..."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "How is everyone this week? Doing well? Alright. Let's get y'all shot."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Six turns? If there's anything left moving on this map in six turns, I'm going to be disappointed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "That's the third time today she's been strangled. She's basically Cheryl from Archer."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Our only other option is... well. Hm. That ''was'' our good option."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I never thought I'd be able to kill this many people in my life. Thank you, everyone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You. Rectify your earlier mistake."
:''Soldier blows sectoid away''
:Cam: "Adequate."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I want to missile you so hard."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh yeah, who's getting ''real food'' when we get back to base? (Asterisk.)"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "I'd like to think my office would have bookshelves. Pillows. A eunuch with a palm frond. You know, the essentials."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*opens door, tripping a group of sectoids*'' "Hi! Candygram!" ''*tosses a grenade*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "If you want to see the end-game content, there's a really easy way to do that."
:Lars: "Play on easy like I did?"
:Cam: "...true."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh for fucking out loud."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after getting distracted by amusing rookie names*'' "Where was I going with this? I was definitely thinking words."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: [http://i.imgur.com/4xOqjDg.gif "...giant floppy donkey dicks..."]
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Oh, a new subscriber! freelance108, welcome to A Swiftly Tilting Cameron, be sure to add your name to the list so I can get you killed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*after talking about how much he likes the game, a soldier misses a 99% shot*'' "I fucking hate this game so much."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Lars: ''*after Rookie Han is the only one left alive*'' "You got this Han. You could say he's going solo."
:Cam: "I will kill you. I will actually kill you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Attention aliens."
:''*fires rocket*''
:Cam: "Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Now, this assault guy should have the ability to..."
:''*soldier annihilated*''
:Cam: "Holy shit!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Let's get... Theatrical"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: ''*dismissing low-ranked soldiers in his home game*'' "Your contribution to Earth's defense has been noted. Thank you, come again."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *After alien leader mentions something about power being in his grasp* "I'll put something in your grasp. No, wait, what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Welcome to Urf."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes during final cut-scene*''
:Cam: ''*headdesk*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes again, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "Oh for titting fuck shit! Ball chunder!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*game crashes a third time, fails to give achievement*''
:Cam: "NO, YOU SON OF A... I'll KILL YOU! I! WILL! KILL! YOU!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*final boss keeps reflecting attacks*''
:Cam: "Dear mother-fucker: Get wrecked."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*Cam tries to skip the final cut-scene*''
:Cam: "Bypass all the encryptions!"
:''*Windows home screen appears*''
:Cam: "No, not like that!"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam ''(shakily, after the third CTD)'': "I didn't think they really meant ''impossible'' when they said 'Impossible.'"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Looking down the bore of a shotgun is like looking into the keyhole of the bathroom of God."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Rookie (after missing a shot): ''"That's a load of bull!"''
:Cam: "I agree! We'll discuss it on your performance review."
:Jo: "He won't make it that long."
:Cam: "Oh he might. Depends how much he believes in blood clotting."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Jo: "Why does it sound like there are firetrucks approaching?"
:Cam: "Oh, that's the music."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam (playing on the highway map): "Get in a car and run them over. Just back over them. Do something."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "We can do this."
:''*beat*''
:Cam: "We cannot actually do this. We will reap only ruin."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Amythist, don't be ridiculous; no one comes to retrieve the bodies. That would be dangerous."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Everything's fine. We're fine."
:''*two countries panic*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Please report to Dr. Vahlen to have your head sawn off."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within (12 hour stream)'''''
*Cam: "Dr. Vahlen's going to be very mad with me for letting you live. She wanted that alien's iPhone."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "When I say 'hunker down', I do not mean 'duck your head down'; just because you can't see them doesn't mean they can't see you. I shouldn't have to explain this to a nominally sapient human being."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Any asshole can play the Sims and say 'Oh, I took away the doors, and now they pee themselves to death'. It takes an artist to create a supervillain sim."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*soldier panics*''
:Cam: "The correct solution in this situation is to shoot one of your friends in the back of the h- *soldier kills alien* ...what?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "You know what? I'm just sick of your shit." ''*orders soldier to throw grenade at enemy*''
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Zulu, I'm going to need you to take a dump right into that man's soul."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Well, we seem to have destroyed our cover. That's awkward."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: *after a completing a mission where a rookie performed admirably* "Now, what's obviously going to happen is you'll get promoted to a sniper and never get used again."
:''*soldier gets promoted and assigned the sniper class*''
:Cam: -_- "I actually called that."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Soldier: "Missed the target."
:Cam. "I *know* you missed."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "We lost one member of our squad, but that doesn't mean there will be an empty bunk back home."
:''*soldier fails to stun Sectoid Commander*''
:Cam: "Fuck you."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*Cam: "Daddy drinks because you suck."
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*mech trooper fires during grenade launcher intro animation*''
:Cam: "Where did you fire that!?"
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''
*''*after the stream ended*''
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): HA HA FUNNY STORY EVERYONE
:Loadingreadyrun (in chat): WE DIDN'T SAVE
::'''''XCOM: Enemy Within'''''

==Thief: The Dark Project==
*Cam: ''*after failing to get the hardware driver to work*'' "Looks like we're going to Pixel Town."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*Cam turns a corner and runs straight into two guards*''
:Cam: "...bother."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: "Hold still, I'm trying to sock you!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*Cam: ''*after fiddling with the display settings*'' "Randomly mashing buttons has an effect! I feel like I'm on ''Star Trek''!"
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''
*''*only humorous retroactively*''
:Alex: "Dark Souls? ''One'' of us needs to play that game."
:Cam: "Do we?"
:Alex: "Well 'need' I use tentatively..."
::'''''Thief: The Dark Project'''''

==Master of Orion 2==
*Cam: "Aww, did your stupid crap get wrecked?"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Aww...our ships."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Oh, they've got tanks! I love watching tanks explode!"
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''
*Cam: "Bye! I accidentally your entire colony."
::'''''Master of Orion 2'''''

==Civilization V: Brave New World==
*Cam: ''*after rival civilization achieves classical era*'' "Shit. We're going to lose."
:Lars: "Wait, really?"
:Cam: "Oh, we're playing Emperor. We were never going to win."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Chat, there is absolutely no circumstance under which you could get me to take my shirt off."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*surprising a barbarian*'' "Did you guys forget about Dre? It's not recommended that you forget about Dre."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "'Our people desire freedom?' That's inconvenient for us."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*looking at new tech options shortly after a battleship battle*'' "Wait. We haven't developed ''ballistics'' yet? '''What have we been shooting?'''"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: ''*Diplomatic Victory Screen appears*'' "'''No!''' No... ''*sad tone*'' We brought ''world peace''..."
:''(...)''
:Cam: "I accidentally destroyed a world of conflict and brought forth an age of peace... Shit!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Keep firing, assholes!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "This is preposterous."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*Graham walks in and holds phone playing Super Mario Bros. 2 theme up to microphone, then leaves*''
:Cam: "Graham Stark, ladies and gentlemen."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "And lo, on that day we founded Atheism. With its tithe representing the bitcoins we mine, and feed the world representing the pizza places that turned away our bitcoins."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Muskets vs riflemen? You gotta twist that!"
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Remind me to reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Lars: "Reactivate that guy in three turns."
:Cam: "I will hurt you."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*Cam: "Bye, Graham. Have fun at GP Portland. Bring me back someone's ear."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''
*''*After a discussion in chat on what a "Yandere" is*''
:Julie: "I don't wanna kill you, sweetie."
:Cam: "Yaaaay!"
:Julie: "I just wanna cuddle you and squeeze you so hard you pop."
:Cam: "...yaaaay."
::'''''Civilization V: Brave New World'''''

==Dark Souls==
*Cam (while drinking Estus): "Scuse me gotta get a gatorade."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Brawndo. It's got what undead crave."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Just chug a fetus."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I'm just gonna roll around till my stam' gets drained and get stabbed a bunch , 'kay?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam ''*after Lars repeatedly threatens to press space*'': "I swear to God Lars, your mother should have eaten you while your bones were still soft."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Get. Fucked. Torch thing. Nobody likes you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Alright Solaire, you just tank him for a bit, and I'll tunnel through to his internal organs."
:''*Knight Solaire has been vanquished*''
:Cam: Uh oh!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Upon defeating the Gaping Dragon after umpteen tries*
:Cam: "Alright. Simple enough."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*''*Dives off the edge trying to dodge poop troll*
:Cam: "BYE!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I see you've met the mosquitoes."
:Cam: "Fuck this game. It was stuck on me; I was inside it."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "I feel funny, Quelaag-chan."
:Alex: ''*loses it*''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "No one is going home until this thing is dead."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Cam: "Now, where's this chucklefuck?"
:''*javelin embeds itself in stone next to Cam*''
:Cam: O_O
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==World of Warcraft: Cataclysm==
*Cam: "How do you kill green mobs like that? Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much."
::'''''World of Warcraft: Cataclysm'''''

==Valkyria Chronicles==
*''*After a tank emerges from being submerged in a river*''
:Lars: "So, let's just back this up for a moment and talk about how an internal *combustion* engine works."
::'''''Valkyria Chronicles'''''

==Bloodborne==
*Cam (in combat): "Have you considered fucking right the hell off?"
::'''''Bloodborne'''''

=Video Games with Video James=
==Minecraft==
*James: ''*checking stream on the phone to check video quality*'' "Oh my God, '''move''', me from the past!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Oh shit, there's a whole tree over there! Oh, wait. That's ''my'' tree. DURR!"
::'''''Minecraft'''''
*James: "Hey, we got it! Oh, no we didn't. That was death."
::'''''Minecraft'''''

==Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning==
*James: "How do I shield? How do I shield? Does anyone know how to shield?"
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "P.S. You can do magic now."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*NPC: "Welcome to Gorhart!"
:James: "Nobody cares."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''
*James: "You will know my name because wherever I go, there will be dead chickens in my path."
::'''''Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning'''''

=LRRMTG=
*Graham: "Kathleen's at the gym, but she's coming back when she's done on the elliptical... which is just her reading ''The Economist''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Nirvana: "What does our deck even '''do'''?"
:Graham: ''*contemplating many cuts*'' "It kills people... It kills people ''really good''."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*Cam: ''*in response to a troll claiming he said yeah too often*'' "Yeah..."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: "I can't believe you guys are creating fanfic featuring relationships between our chatroom moderation bot and our air conditioner."
:''*pause*''
:Graham: "I love you guys."
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''
*Graham: ''*in response to Kathleen trying to give him affection on-stream*'' "No... Not in front of the chat..."
::'''''Magic: the Gathering Online'''''
*''Magic the Gathering stream starts, Cam introduces it, explaining where Graham, Kathleen, and James are*''
:Cam: ''*looks around*'' "Wait, do you guys hear something?"
:''*turns around, rips green screen fabric off something in the back, revealing Alex behind him*''
::'''''Magic the Gathering Online'''''

=House of Stark=
==Resident Evil 6==
*Graham: "You just straight up killed the president, you DINK!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Friend balloon! Nooo!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Because God forbid I move A CHAIR."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Who keeps giving you a shotgun?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham shooting Rasklapanjes in a toilet''
:Graham: "Alright, I am never going to the toilet in China, ever again."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "If a person gets hit by a bus, the bus is winning."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "It's a good thing we're on the express; you don't find this much ammo on the local."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Graham facepalms''
:Graham: "When did this become a Rom-Com?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*[[Maya Kramer|Maya]]: "He's eating them and making himself stronger! Because zombies are additive!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That's what you're going to say, 'He just doesn't quit', as opposed to 'WHAT THE MOTHERING SHIT WAS THAT?!'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Screw your bonsai tree!"
:Maya: "I spent so many years growing that tree!"
:Graham:" Yeah? Well, now an American is here to save from it."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "That is no longer Marco, that is a swarm of- what in the hell?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Only the finest Dim-Sum restaurants serve grenade launcher ammo with the meal."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Dix, I know this isn't your branch of the military, but do aircraft carriers usually have vats of lava?"
:Dix (in chat): "UH WHAT"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris Vs. Leon! Who will win? Nobody cares."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Recurring:''
:Graham: "SHOOT {Him/Her}!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Why aren't they talking in Chinese? Why are they using racist movie Chinese?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*pushes enemy over rail*'' "Have a nice trip... See you next... eat my ass."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh no! I hate the testicle wasps!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I mean come back, I guess? I don't really wish to associate with you further, but I think that's part of my mission."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Chris, level with me: how much have you had to drink today? Seriously?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''As a three-story zombie appears''
:Graham: "Uhm... question. Ya'll see that, right? I haven't had too much peanut sauce?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Hey; just cuz you've got your memory back doesn't make you the boss of me!" [pause] "That you are the Captain of this squad technically makes you the boss of me, but I still don't have to like it!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "J'avooooo...come out to plaaaaaayyyyy..."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Bruce Willis is, Jake Kickpunch in, 'Die Hard: Live Free, or Fuck Off'"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*sees an icon on a corpse*'' "Can I ''vault'' that?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: ''*shoots zombies off a ladder one by one*'' "This is my new favorite thing!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "I don't like these guys. They're ''weird'' and... weird."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "Oh! It's a cutscene. We're fine."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*Graham: "35... money... for this textured pile?! Amazing!"
:''(later)''
:Graham: "35 money is an amount! These are on sale for 15!"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''*Graham sniping zombies*''
:Graham: "Hey lady."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey dude."
:''*gunshot*''
:Graham: "Hey other lady."
:''*gunshot*''
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''While fighting T-Rex!Simmons in a helicopter''
:Graham: "Oh hey Dix. Again, not your branch of the military, but d'you have any idea how much ordnance a helicopter like this usually carries?"
:Dix: (in chat) "Absolutely no idea. Get back to me in like 2 years after I drop a Helicopter flight officer packet."
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''
*''Fighting Simmons''
:Simmons: "Every last piece of you belongs to me!"
:Graham: "What, all of it? Including the taint? And the back of the knee?"
::'''''Resident Evil 6'''''

==Minecraft==

==Alan Wake's American Nightmare==
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Demon fliers: They can get fucked."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Arizona: There ain't shit."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*watching evil double wrap hand*'' "Is he making land-line knuckles? The worst garrote in the world? What is going on? He ''is'' making land-line knuckles... Why do we have to do this over Skype?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in "Dark" voice, in response to an on-screen command*'' "Tell me about the signal."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Okay, what do you want me to put in you: spiders or the D? Because I'm super not okay with one of them, and I probably shouldn't do the other one either."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Ha! Oh... I thought I had a different gun equipped. But it still worked out well, so my 'Ha!' still stands."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Everything's fine. We're just caught in a time loop."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: ''*in Alan Wake near-monotone narration voice*'' "Alan Wake. The man who came to kick ass and chew bubblegum and found himself, unfortunately, entirely out of gum."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Graham: "Wow, he just walked through that cactus like he did not care about his genitals."
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
*Kathleen: "Is his long term plan to kill Alan through Vitamin D deficiency?"
::'''''Alan Wake's American Nightmare'''''
==Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes==
*Graham: "What light is this?! What is lighting me?! I want to kill it!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*lifts prisoner out of cage*'' "Yoink!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*to chopper*'' "Do '''NOT''' land on my prisoners!"
:''*chopper slowly descends above prisoners*'' "Don't do it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*accidentally runs over a guy with the truck, alerting everyone*'' "Shit!"
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*driving a tank, in a silly, ironic voice*'' "I'm being stealthy! Hello!" ''*fires tank's gun*''
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: ''*mockingly*'' "We're engaged with an enemy force. We're getting married in the spring."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
*Graham: "I think I just crushed a rat by diving on it."
::'''''Metal Gear Solid: Ground Zeroes'''''
==Goat Simulator==
*Graham: "I can't disengage the blowhole!"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*as the all-traits-but-robot goat flails horrifyingly into the sky*'' "Godspeed, young cosmogoat."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Alex: ''*walks into in-game version of developer's studio with the all-traits-but-robot goat*'' "Mother! I have come for you! Why did you make me!?"
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''
*Kathleen: "They're still having their picnic."
:Graham: "Not for long!" ''*dumps giant goat on picnic table*''
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Dark Souls==
:''Hellkite Dragon lands directly in Graham's path, then flies off''
*Alex: "Oh... hello."
*Graham: "Mmm... mm-hm... mmmm-hm. Alright then, it's been fun." [About faces and runs back the way he came]
*Alex: "You just go home... wherever home ''is''. Turns out it's at the bottom of a well."
::'''Dark Souls'''
*Graham: "This looks suspicious..."
:''dragon appears''
:Alex: "BWAWK!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Who put a boar in armour, and how!?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do I use this?"
:Alex: "You have to speak to an NPC that doesn't talk to you."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I'm going that way anyway, but this way, I don't have to fight DogBall again."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Alex: ''*after enemy rolls backwards off platform*'' "Did he just YOLO-cide?"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "What's this way?"
:Alex: "I don't remember... Oh wait, I do remember..."
:Graham: "Is it death?"
:Alex: "Think about that question."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Let's go back up to... up."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Why is there a dead guy over here? Wait, Graham. You've played Resident Evil. Why would you think he was dead? He's not dead at all! He's big and scary!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: ''*mimicking reproaching voice*'' "Graham, there were only five salamanders in the world, and you've killed the last one."
:"But I only killed four!"
:''*reproaching voice*'' "One of them was pregnant."
:''Alex loses it''
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "How do you fight it?"
:Alex: "With fight."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "Wooo! Spring break! I beat it with no pants! I beat it with no pants! I get a cookie!"
::'''''Dark Souls'''''
*Graham: "I am going to shit-fling the Capra Demon before the evening is out."
::'''''Dark Souls'''''

==Viscera Detail==
*Graham: "You guys are going to have a brand-new facility by the time I'm done."
:''*accidentally sets wall on fire*''
:Graham: "Uh oh."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*Slosh-o-Matic dispenses severed limb instead of bucket*''
:Graham: "I really wish people would stop leaving legs in the Slosh-o-Matic."
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''
*''*scanner keeps detecting mess nearby*''
:Graham:"Where!? Where is dirty!? I've cleaned everywhere! What do you want!?"
::'''''Viscera Detail'''''

==Deus Ex: Human Revolution==
*''*while running through the holding cells in the police station*''
:Prostitute: "Sorry babe, can't do it through the bars."
:Graham: "That is a lie! I have seen that."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "Eat my ass, Pritchard!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Prostitute: "There's just *something* about a man who's augmented."
:Graham: "...and that something is made of metal and carbon fibre."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*accidentally moves from one piece of cover to the next, interrupting gang conversation*''
:Gang Member: "Somebody there?"
:Graham: "Nope."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Businessman: "I'm sure you have a file on me as thick as you have on Taggart."
:Graham: "Oh, I have a thick file alright...wait, I'm sorry, what were we talking about?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Citizen (in Mandarin): "I'm busy."
:Graham (as Drunk Jensen): "I'm busy too. I don't even speak you language; how did I even understand that?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham (still as Drunk Jensen): "Why can't I fit through this man-sized hole?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "You don't have to go through the drawers. I just have to go through all the drawers."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Sarif: "We can't afford another punch in the face."
:Graham: "...or can we?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''[To Alex]'' "Your cat's poop looks like almonds?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: ''*bursts through door*'' "Heeeere's Fisty!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "It literally is the Drunk Jensen lightning round!"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Mrphlip (in chat): "I'm *not* adding "shoot them in the tits" to !advice. Just saying that now."
:Graham: "Thank you, Mrphlip."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*''*Graham looking at the main menu after watching the first ending*''
:Graham: "New game plus!? *sighs* Oh, were gonna be here a while."
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''
*Graham: "If you could, you would totally download a baby. Instead of carrying it around for eight months. (Thinks) Or nine months if you don't want a premature baby. Why did I say eight months?"
::'''''Deus Ex: Human Revolution'''''

==Destiny==
*Matt: "Oh shit. I have girl guide cookies in my freezer."
:Graham: "You son of a bitch!"
::'''''Destiny'''''

==Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back==
*Graham: "Now, if I could just not fall in a pit."
:''*immediately falls in pit*''
::'''''Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back'''''

==Grand Theft Auto V==
*Graham: "Calm down, I just need your bike so I can get to my blimp!"
::'''''Grand Theft Auto V'''''

=Let's Nope=
==Outlast==
*Alex: "Where the '''frick''' is the frickin' frick that I'm supposed to frick?"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Where's the 'bite your own tongue and bleed to death' button? Is it 'K"? No, that didn't work."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Eat a shit dick in the Waffle House!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: ''*explaining why the stream went down*'' "I believe the technical term for this is that the program shit its ass inside-out."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "I expected much worse."
:Alex: "Much worse than having your fucking fingers cut off by a toilet knife!?"
:Graham: "Toilet scissors, please."
:Cam: "Urinal shears."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Uh...what? [[LRRbot]] subscribed? Skynet, thank you for subscribing!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''Alex hides in a locker''
:Cam: "Canned meat."
:Alex: "Thanks Cam."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "Alex has gone full poultry. I've never seen Alex go full poultry before."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Graham: "The laundry chute needs three fuses."
:Alex: "Three!?"
:Kathleen: "Get fucked!"
:Alex: "Fffffffffffffff"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*Alex: "Spaghet! Wait, wait, wait... He hasn't spaghetted us yet."
:Kathleen: "Uh... He's spaghetted you."
:Alex: "No, he hasn't."
:Kathleen: "Oh, he's running!"
:Alex: "The music hasn't started."
:Graham: "He's sphagetting right for you."
:Alex: "He can spaghett fucked."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex opens door to find an ice tunnel*''
:Kathleen: "We're in a Bond lair."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*"Crumple Wiltskin" gets owned by the Walrider*''
:Alex: ''*raises camera*'' "Imma YouTube this shit!"
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Alex finds a severed head in a jar*''
:Graham: ''*muffled*'' "I'm Commander Shepard, and this is my least-favorite jar in the Citadel."
::'''''Outlast'''''
*''*Game displays "New objective: Get out."*''
:Alex: "What do you mean '''new''' objective!?"
::'''''Outlast'''''

==Among the Sleep==
*Alex: "Is there a socket around here? And a butter knife?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Teddy: "I don't think we're supposed to be here."
:Alex: "*You* fucking led me here!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "If you think I am crawling around in this spooky-ass house without a full diaper, you are sadly mistaken."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*crawls into a room covered in rusted panels*''
:Alex: "...aaaaand, Silent Hill."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*distant screaming*''
:Beej: "That's the sound of children having fun."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "We died! We're dead! We're 100% dead! We died! We're dead! We died! We're dead!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "Why weren't you trying to hide!?"
:Alex: "What happened, Beej, was that I freaked out..."
:Beej: "Yeah."
:Alex: "...and then we died."
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Beej: "This game has Occulus support."
:Alex: "Fuck! That! In the ear!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*''*while Alex hides from the nearby monster*''
:Alex: "Dick! Shit! Ass! Fuck! Colonoscopy! Barbara Streisand!"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''
*Alex: "Mom, I need you to be straight with me. Did you make a pact with Satan?"
::'''''Among the Sleep'''''

==Viscera Cleanup Detail==
*Beej: "You know what would make this worse?"
:''*Alex picks up lamp and breaks it*''
:Alex: "Shit!"
::'''''Viscera Cleanup Detail'''''

==Condemned: Criminal Origins==
*Alex: "Why did it have to be mannequins?"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*ragdoll flailing against a wall*''
:Alex: "I need an old priest and a young priest!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "That's a dude."
:Serge: "Nah, that's a mannequin."
:Alex: "Mannequins don't have idle stances, Serge!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Wait, there's a pardon-fuck counter?"
:Chat (Ritchards): "Serge, we count everything!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Alex: "Let me see if I can bury you."
:''*repeatedly smacks body with shovel*''
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*''*sounds of thumping and grunting coming from the next room*''
:Alex: "Wow, they are going to town."
:Serge: "It's ok, it sounds consensual."
:Alex: -_-
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''
*Serge: "Alex, repeat after me."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I must not fear."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "Fear is the little death that brings total annihilation."
:Alex: "ASS!"
:Serge: "I will face my fear."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "I will permit it to pass over me and through me."
:Alex: "Ass!"
:Serge: "And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "And when the fear has gone there will be nothing..."
:Alex: "Ass."
:Serge: "...only I will remain."
:Alex: "...ass."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*''*Rosa notices there's a master key in a door lock*''
:Alex: "Sweet! Looks like somebody was doing a speedrun and fucked up."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins''''

*Serge: "Also, what is a waifu?"
:Alex: "Uhh..."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex (singing terribly): "All we are saying...is give us a break."
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

*Alex: "Fuck you clown! Clown, fuck youuuuuuu!"
::'''''Condemned: Criminal Origins'''''

==Doorways==
*Alex: "Man, the love shack's really gone down hill."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Mia: "That's an odd way to do things. It's like an Ikea torture device."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*''*flash of woman rotating on torture wheel*''
:Mia: "Well, that's one way to make hamburgers."
::'''''Doorways'''''
*Alex: "I fixed all your stupid torture devices. You'll get my invoice in the mail."
::'''''Doorways'''''

==Stalker: Call of Pripyat==
*''*Alex discovers a copy of 'Mein Kampf* in an NPC's inventory''
:Alex: "What!? Why is that in there!?"
:Mia: The *one* night you bring the Jewish girl in.
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

*Alex: "Hey Mia, where's my shotgun?"
::'''''Stalker: Call of Pripyat'''''

==Afterfall: Insanity==
*Graham: "Do those knee-pads come in handy when you're sucking the Colonel's dick!?"
:Alex: O_O
:NPC: "Hey man, don't shoot the messenger."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "So, you explained the knee-pads. What are the shoulder pads for?"
:Graham: "Shhh..."
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

*Alex: "I swear, if I make a horror game, I will never include a section where you have to turn the power back on."
:Graham: "But Alex, how would there be power to the doors?"
:Alex: *burps*
::'''''Afterfall: Insanity'''''

==Five Nights at Freddy's==
*''*Alex switches to the dining room camera and finds Bonnie has moved there*''
:Alex: "Fuck everything forever."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex switches light on, which reveals Bonnie in the hallway*''
:Alex: "Oh hi!"
:''*shuts door*''
:Alex: "Get fucked!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "Like, I know it's coming-" *Freddy jumps out*
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "I wish... I was playing... Outlast..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*Alex: "What does the fox say? [...] <BLAERGH!!!>"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Alex has just closed both doors with robots at each one*''
:Alex: "We live here now! We live here now..."
:Ash: "And we're good!"
:Alex: "We'll just sit here 'til the end of time... The end of time..."
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Freddy glitch appears on screen*''
:Alex: "What the fuck?! What in the fuck is that!?"
:Ash: "I don't know!"
:Alex: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!?!?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*Spots the Golden Freddie Poster, then closes the monitor to see Golden Freddie in the control room*''
:Ash: "Oh, God!"
:Alex: "Oh, good, Hi! We're dead... We're dead..."
:''*Alex backs away and raises his hands in the air, and Freddie gets them*''
:''*The stream screen goes dark and Alex laughs nervously*''
:Alex: "We just got..."
:''*Alex wheels back looking shocked*''
:Alex: "You can't see this, but it just quit the game!"
:''*Ash laughs*''
:Alex: "Do we die in real life now?"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

*''*While waiting for Chica to ambush them, Ash is covering her face.*''
:Ash: "Ash? BAWK-BAWK-BAWK-BAWK!!!"
:''*Continues to "BAWK" as Chicka jumps them and Ash screams*''
:''*They both laugh after a moment*''
:Alex: "We're BAWK-ED!"
::'''''Five Nights at Freddy's'''''

==Penumbra: Requiem==
*Alex: ''*opens door to check if the coast is clear*''
:''*monster walks past*''
:Alex: ''*manic laughter*'' ''*shuts door*''
::'''''Penumbra: Requiem'''''

==Clive Barker's Undying==
*''*while Alex messes around with graphics options on the PC*
:Kathleen: "You should save the game before you do this, Alex."
:Alex: "That would be a good idea."
:''*Alex clicks back to game and immediately kills the maid by accident*
::'''''Clive Barker's Undying'''''

==The Evil Within==
*Ian: "This is like a mix between Return of the Jedi and Monty Python."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Graham (as disembodied head on side of camera): "I am led to believe you can break boxes in this game. Yeeeess, my disembodied head is pleeeeeased."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Ian: "This is Legend of Zelda levels of property damage."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''
*Alex: "But how does it cut chain?"
:Ian: "It’s a CHAINsaw, Alex. In the same way a woodsaw is for wood, and a bonesaw is for Spider-Man."
::'''''The Evil Within'''''

==Amnesia: The Dark Descent==
*James: "We have five minutes to find a bong, then we can 420 blaze it."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex (trying to stack boxes): "This is the worst Minecraft mod ever."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*James: "I hate fun. I am the worst."
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Serge: "Oh, we're playing as a racist. Isn't that nice?"
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "This looks like acid." *touches it, gets burned*
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

*Alex: "The moral of the story is: WHITE PEOPLE!" ''*shakes fist angrily*''
::'''''Amnesia: The Dark Descent'''''

==Neverending Nightmares==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: "What the actual ass!?"
::'''''Neverending Nightmares'''''

==Condemned 2==
*''*Alex come across a pit of moving doll arms, with a narrow plank across it*''
:Alex: *picks up prosthetic arm* "Now we're armed."
::'''''Condemned 2'''''

==Spooky's House of Jump Scares==
*Alex: Run quickly! Run more quickly! Ahahahahahah!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: Fuck you, Pumpkin! Eat shit!"
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

*Alex: <incoherent gibberish>
::'''''Spooky's House of Jump Scares'''''

=Watch + Play=
==Air Control==

*Graham: "How did they make this much garbage?"
:Alex: "Because they're filthy animals, that's why."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode*
:Alex: "Wha- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Game enters 'Flappy Bird' mode a second time*
:Alex: "You... Fucking... Fuck... Dick... Ass..."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham: "Whose brain is that and why is it rolling away from you?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*''*Alex wades through a sea of organs*
:Graham: "How many people got on this plane!?"
:Alex *turns to around to look at the passengers and organs*: "That many."
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Alex: "Where the fuck is the ground, Graham!?"
::'''''Air Control'''''

*Graham (mimicking an aeroplane annoncement): "In the event of a water landing, the plane will nose lazily into the ocean and come to a full stop."
::'''''Air Control'''''

==The Hat Man: Shadow Ward==

*''*Alex picks up a book, causing the game to shift into "horror game" mode*
:Alex: "Shit, I turned on Silent Hill. Ah...where's the 'turn off Silent Hill' button?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

*Graham: "And now, Alex Steacy will review this video game, through a mouthful of strudel."
:Alex: "Oh my god. Can that be a thing on this channel, please?"
::'''''The Hat Man: Shadow Ward'''''

==Goat Simulator==

*Alex: "There's one last thing I have to do."
:''*Graham notices Alex dragging a car towards the Scrambler*
:Graham: "HOLY SHIT! NO!"
:Alex: "Yesssss..."
::'''''Goat Simulator'''''

==Alpha Zylon==

*''*Alex dies to a hidden trap*''
:Alex: "So, this is Dark Souls."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*''*hostages speaking gibberish*''
:Alex: "They're speaking racist."
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

*Graham: "PLEASE_ugbhfnghblhrbn has just subscribed!"
::'''''Alpha Zylon'''''

==A New Reckoning==

*Alex: "My patch notes for this game will be: turn the spider faucet off."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Alex: "This is what we call a fuck of spiders."
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

*Kathleen: "So, what is the plot for this game?"
:''*Graham and Alex crack up laughing*''
::'''''A New Reckoning'''''

==4PM==

*Graham: "So Alex, how do you feel about a psychological thriller?"
:Alex: "Uh oh."
::'''''4PM'''''

*Graham: "This is a game that is so far up its own ass, it's coming out its mouth."
::'''''4PM'''''

==The You Testament==

*Graham: "Dude, it's you and Muhammed!? You are so fucked!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*''*Alex accidentally switches the game to wireframe mode*''
:Alex and Graham: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
::'''''The You Testament'''''
*Graham (reading chat): "Wait, in the game, you can impregnate women through hugs?"
:Alex: "Yeah. That's how it works, right?"
:Graham: "...yes. That is how that works."
::'''''The You Testament'''''

==The Zoo Race==
*''*Cam walks in, sees Alex's character stuck in the air*''
:Cam: "What have you done?"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham (trying to calm down from laughing): "I am in a considerable amount of distress."
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Alex: "I overshot the finish line and fell off the world!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''
*Graham: "This is like the worst Disneyland ride ever!"
::'''''The Zoo Race'''''

==Real Horror Stories==
*''*shadow dashes across the screen for the fifth time*''
:Graham: "Who *is* that asshole?"
::'''''Real Horror Stories'''''

=Crossing the Streams=
==Minecraft: Super Hostile==
* Alex: ''*while being pursued by a pack of Creepers*'' "Oh shit. Double shit. A thousand shit."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I'm just going to-" ''*walks into lava*'' "...oh."
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*''*explosion*''
:Alex (off-camera): *screams*
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "AnimusFallen has just- OH GOD THERE'S SILVERFISH EVERYWHERE!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
*Graham: "I FOUND THE WOOL! IT'S THROUGH A ROOM OF NOTHING BUT DEATH!"
::'''''Minecraft: Super Hostile'''''
==Dokapon Kingdom==
*Heather: "Is that sexy to you?"
:Cam: "It's awfully low res. I generally prefer my women a bit higher res."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Where's my hat? Where's my fucking hat!? I went to Hell, and came back with a beard."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*''*Cam comes back in after Cori accidentally makes the Money Trickster betray Cam and steal his money*''
:Cam: "WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
:''*later*''
:Cam: "You're all laughing at me now, but you have no idea where I just peed."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cam: "Eat shit, pixie!"
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
*Cori (to Beej): "First, I will punch this game, then I will punch you."
::'''''Dokapon Kingdom'''''
==Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory==
*Graham: "Oh no...you can put your own textures in the game."
:Cam: "I'm sure that hasn't been abused at all."
::'''''Hyperdimension Neptunia Victory'''''

=Adam's GameHaus=
==Asura's Wrath==
* Adam: "Listen, we're not here to fuck spiders."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "If there is a face, then we can punch it!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Now kiss!"
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
* Adam: "Lava arms? Whatever dude, been there, done that, got the t-shirt."
::'''''Asura's Wrath'''''
==Dead Space==
* Adam " If I ever have to move I'm inviting Isaac Clark. Not, you know, because of lifting things, it's because my house is infested with aliens."
::'''''Dead Space'''''
==The Walking Dead==
* Adam: "What happened to the zombies?"
* Morgan: "Didn't you shoot them all in the face?"
* Adam: "Oh, that's right, I did!"
::'''''The Walking Dead'''''

=Non-LRL Streams=
==[http://www.twitch.tv/streambros StreamBros]==
===Titanfall===
*Game: "Warning! Another titan is attacking you!"
:[[Matt Wiggins|Matt]]: ''*facing and directly engaged in battle with said titan*'' "I can tell..."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*after shooting a teammate accidentally*'' "Something something, check your corners. Something something, friendly fire."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*[[Andrew Ferguson|Andrew]]: "There are like 40 guys around."
:Matt: "They're inside this building."
:Andrew: ''*gets lost*'' "This? No..."
:Matt: "Clearly not in that part of the building. That is a '''wall''', Andrew."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt (to Andrew): "There's a dude on that roof! ''There's a dude on that roof!'' '''You should shoot the dude on that roof!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Victory!"
:Andrew: "I shall celebrate by shooting that guy."
:Matt: "By shooting that dude ''straight'' in the face."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: ''*regarding microphone issues on the Kinect*'' "I think we're going in and out depending on..." ''*sound cuts out as he continues speaking*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Basically, [[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]] and myself, and uh... [[LeeLee Scaldaferri|LeeLee]] and Andrew should all just get together and make '''our own''' sketch comedy troupe, with blackjack and hookers. It'll be great! LRR North!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Bounces Off Walls' Wiggins!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Andrew: "When we sign off of here in a little bit, we're going to watch the new Captain America movie."
:Matt: "CAPTAIN 'MERIKUH!"
:Andrew: "Holy shit, that game looks amazing!"
:Matt: "Uh... That's a movie."
:Andrew: "That movie looks amazing, too!"
:Matt: "I don't there '''is''' a new Captain Amovie..."
:Andrew: "I don't think so, either."
:Matt: "'''CAPTAIN AMOVIEKA!'''"
:Andrew: "Captain of Movies!"
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*chooses "Massive Payload" burn card*''
:Andrew: "Would you like to hear about my massive payload?"
:Matt: ''*turns to face Andrew slowly*''
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: ''*checking the quotes page*'' "I don't remember saying half of these things."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a titan. It can see you. And you're dead."
:Andrew: "That was just a guy."
:Matt: "That was an AI guy, too."
::'''''Titanfall'''''
*Matt: "That's a shield. ''That's an enemy!'' '''That's a lot of fucking exploding!'''"
::'''''Titanfall'''''

===Peggle 2===
*Andrew: "Did I just de-op us from our own channel?"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
*Matt: "Matt 'Has a ton of balls' Wiggins"
::'''''Peggle 2'''''
===Starwhal: Just the Tip===
*Matt: "And here we see the majestic '''FUUUUUUUUCK!'''"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
*Andrew: "I'm trapped on his mouth!"
::'''''Starwhal: Just the Tip'''''
===Broforce===
*Andrew: "You're back! You're dead."
:Matt: "I'm alive! I'm dead."
:Andrew: "You're alive again! Make the most of it this time!"
:Matt: "And I'm dead again."
::'''''Broforce'''''
*''*Andrew accidentally punches an explosive barrel*'''
:Matt: "'''Really?''' Really."
:Andrew: "What?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "No, I didn't."
:Matt: "Yes, you did."
:Andrew: "What'd I do?"
:Matt: "You blew us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "How?"
:Matt: "By blowing us ''both'' up."
:Andrew: "I was just punching guys."
:Matt: "You blew us. ''Both'' up."
:Andrew: "I am very strongly starting to suspect you're making shit up."
:Matt: ''*talking over him*'' "You blew. Us both up."
::'''''Broforce'''''

===RocketsRocketsRockets===
*[[Ashton Cummings|Ashton]]: "I was controlling the wrong rocket the ''entire time''..."
::'''''RocketsRocketsRockets'''''

===Dungeons of Dredmor===
*Andrew: ''*while in the basement of a library*'' "Who left this street lamp down here?"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "The techno-sewers!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: ''*facetiously*'' "Sweet! Small crossbow! 1 damage! Get wrecked!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''
*Andrew: "Oh my God, it's a clone army down there! I'm fighting George Lucas!"
::'''''Dungeons of Dredmor'''''