'Movie' Movies Movie

All your favorite 'Movie' movies in one place! Maybe now you can avoid seeing the originals.

Vital Statistics

Date: August 25, 2008

Category: Shorts

Appearing: Paul, Graham, Matt, Bill, James, Kathleen, Andy, Christine Clay

Writing: Paul

Shooting: Graham, Jer

Editing: Graham

Synopsis

If you actually enjoyed those 'Movies', here is combination of these with even lower production values and even less humorous jokes.

Transcript

(T-Shirt Ad)

(Andy is crouched at the side of a road, cradling a LoadingReadyLIVE t-shirt in his arms)

Andy: "Hi, I'm Andrew Cownden. Every day, hundreds of these t-shirts are abandoned, or put down, because we can't find homes for them. For the price of just four cups of coffee, or one astoundingly delicious cup of coffee, you can afford to adopt one of these LoadingReadyRun t-shirts. Please, think of the children--they might want a t-shirt."

(end ad)

(On a white background, red CG movie titles fly onto the screen as they're spoken)

Narrator (Graham): "If you were frightened by Scary Movie, inspired by Epic Movie, got a little fresh during Date Movie, and then went home to Meet the Spartans, then this is the movie for you."

(Fartinidus (Graham) appears on a badly-green-screened background of a field)

Fartinidus: "Oh SNAP!"

(Again with the CG titles)

Narrator: "LoadingReadyPictures presents, one of those 'Movie' Movies Movie. Sit back and relax as we parody all your favorite moments from all the other 'Movie' movies."

(Cut to Fartinidus and Clown-wig-James in front of a badly green-screened background of a stone wall; parts of the clown wig are see-through from the green screen)

Narrator: "And by parody, we mean we're just gonna re-do them with a lower budget and more jokes about bodily fluids. And breakdancing, for some reason! Remember this hilarious scene?"

(Cut to a clip from Meet the Spartans)

Narrator: "Well wouldn't it be funny if THIS happened?"

(Fartinidus is on the stone-wall background)

Fartinidus: "I asked for three-hundred men." (Cut to two Spartans (James, Matt) and Ned Bitterman (Paul) standing on the green-screen field; cuefart noise) "This seems like 100 times less than that..." (Cut back to the "soldiers" and cue fart noise) "Did you move the decimal place, or something...?"

Narrator: "Now, you might think that wasn't funny, but that's okay! Because we're gonna wink at the camera and acknowledge that it wasn't funny, thereby making it funny again!"

(Fartinidus and Bitterman against the stone wall)

Fartinidus: "Huh, that's not good. We're getting bad reviews on the internet. Which I have here on my iPhone."

Ned Bitterman: "That's a current piece of technology, isn't it?"

Fartinidus: "It sure is."

Bitterman: "Hmm."

Fartinidus: "But luckily, those bad reviews won't affect our box office sales, because stupid people like seeing things they remember."

Bitterman: "That's right."

Narrator: "And don't worry if you haven't seen any of the other Movies--we'll make sure that all the characters let you in on the joke."

(Fartinidus is in the CG field)

Fartinidus: "Spartans! My name is Fartinidus, which is a clever play on the name of the hero from the movie Meet the Spartans, which in turn was making fun of Leonidas, from the movie 300, which was popular."

(Cut back to Fartinidus and Clown Wig James against the CG wall)

Narrator: "To prove that we're hip and contemporary, there's also going to be a raft of shoddy impressions of celebrities that happen to be in the news at the time we're filming."

(Flash-cut to "Conan O'Brien" (Andy) in a bare apartment?)

"Conan": "Hey I'm Conan O'Brien I'm gonna be taking over for Jay Leno next year!"

("Conan" starts dancing, and is punched in the face by out-of-frame-Bill; cut to "Miley Cyrus" (Christine) standing in front of a garage door)

"Miley" (Christine): "Hi y'all, I'm Miley Cyrus!"

("Miley" is also punched in the face by out-of-frame-Bill; cut to an ACTUAL FIELD! As the Narrator speaks, Mr. Tiddlywinks (Bill), a Random Everygirl (Kathleen), Ned Bitterman, and Fartinidus "appear" in the field through a series of close-ups on each.)

Narrator: "And as if that wasn't enough, 'Movie' Movies Movie weaves together the plotlines from all the other Movie movies into a seamless whole."

Fartinidus: "Don't worry, Random Everygirl. I may have just been transported through time to the year 2008, but I will still save you from the terrible Persian Army. Who apparently is this serial killer from any generic horror movie."

(Fartinidus and Tiddlywinks begin to fight, interrupted by Random Everygirl running into frame)

Random Everygirl: "Wait! I'm just a lonely single girl trying to make it in the big city! You see I used to be quite comically overweight, but then my cowboy friend gave me a makeover! He's gay! Like in that movie, Brokeback Mountain!"

(Bitterman steps into frame)

Bitterman: "I have a confession--I'm not actually a gay cowboy. I'm actually..."

(Bitterman removes his hat)

Bitterman: "...a space alien! It's a twist, like in an M. Night Shyamalan movie!"

Fartinidus: "So...wait, does that mean YOU'RE supposed to be the Persian army?"

Bitterman: "Er...well...maybe? I dun...I dunno."

Mr. Tiddlywinks: "There's only one way to settle this: DANCE FIGHT!"

(dance fight; cut to CG 'Movie' Movies Movie title)

Narrator: "'Movie' Movies Movie. Coming soon to a DVD 3-to-5 dollars bin near you."

(Cut back to Fartinidus in the ACTUAL FIELD!)

Fartinidus: "I am SO confused."

Trivia

• The bad green screening which removed parts of James's hair was intentional
• Paul wears the same cowboy outfit as in High Noon
• This is the second time Mr. Tiddlywinks has spoken; he talked previously in Ways to Get Yourself Killed in a Horror Movie

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